Wow. I have realized that I seem very mean in my previous post. I think I'm letting some stress get to the better of me. I know that I should not be worried, but as I think about what my life is going to be like for the next few months, I get kinda anxious. I am not a fan of anxiety. It may be jumping the gun, considering I've not yet been accepted to seminary, but I'm scared about leaving home. I'm scared that I won't get to see my family on a regular basis and that I'll miss out on my two nephews' growing up years, and that they won't remember me as the silly, let's have fun aunt that I try to be. I'm afraid that my friends; especially my two best friends and I will drift apart. I'm afraid that things here will go to pot, and I'm afraid that I will feel guilty if they do.
But on the other hand, I'm excited about leaving. I'm excited about the new friends I will make and come to love. I'm a pretty outgoing, funny, lively, and energetic person. I was voted as class clown in high school, and I have always found ways to have fun. I know that I will not completely lose my whole family because I love them and I know we can use email, telephones, and occasional trips home to keep in touch. I know that I have 4 siblings who can help my mother in my stead as I work on higher education. I also know that I have felt anxious in the past, and when I really stepped back and looked at my life, I could see God at work. Therefore, I know that God loves me, has a plan for me, and will not let me be crushed. Nothing can separate me from the love of God in Christ Jesus; not even my hysterical tirades against my hometown... I need to remember that it is not my own calling, but it is God's call in my life that has led me to this place and God will not forsake me as I begin a new leg of my journey. So, I guess that this post has allowed me some time to think about the situation in which I find myself, and I feel better. You guys are great for listening to me. Thanks.