Friday, December 16, 2005


Alright, so it's been a few days since I last posted. I spent a few days and nights at Sister's house in order to get good sleep and not worry about bats. However, Monday afternoon I did come home to get some more clothes, feed my dog, and a few other things. So, I was talking to Ma that day and she said that after she went shopping on Sunday, she came home and saw the bat flying around. She said it was swooping at her and acting like it was trying to attack her or something. So, she tried to get it out of the house, but it just wouldn't go. Then, she called 1/3 of the "bat squad." I call these three local people who we will call "Jackie, Julie, and Jorge" the bat squad because February 2004 they helped me out. That story goes like this:

Mom was on a cruise in the Caribbean with her "friend." Therefore, I was home alone for a week which does not bother me. In fact, I like to be alone. But anyway.. I went upstairs one night and was sitting on my bed reading some little book. So, I journaled a little bit about what I had read and then I took off my glasses, turned out the light, and laid down. Not five minutes later I heard this bizarre scratching noise. I thought, "Do I want to know what that is? Should I turn on the light or just go to sleep?" But the scratching was too loud to be a bug, so I decided I'd better turn on the light and see. Well, I turned on the light, but I am "blind as a bat" without my glasses on. However, I looked up and saw a big blurry black mass on my white window frame. I thought, "WHAT THE HECK IS THAT!?!?!" So, I bolted upright, grabbed my glasses, and saw it: the bat! Then, it swooped at me and I started screaming hysterically as I pulled my blankets up over my head. Screaming was a fruitless effort, considering I was home alone, but I was really scared. So I sat there under all my covers for about five minutes trying to listen to hear if it was still in my room. So finally, I came out and was looking all around and didn't see it. But I was convinced it was under my bed, so I just sat on my bed hyperventilating for a while. Then I reached down and grabbed my socks. I put them on and talked up my courage for about 15 minutes to get out of bed. Finally, I jumped off my bed, turned on every single light I came across, and bolted down the stairs as fast as I could go. This was about 3:00 a.m. So, I put one of Ma's "chemo hats" on and went into the bathroom, shut the door, tucked a towel in the crack at the bottom, and slept in there for a few hours. Then I woke up and left the house.

Later that night, I went to work. When I got back to Podunk, I realized I couldn't stay in the house if the bat was still there. So I stopped at the local tavern (Podunk is a VERY small town where everyone knows who is who and who hangs out where, etc). So, I saw "Jackie and Julie" outside of the tavern and asked "Jackie" if she knew anything about bats. She said, yeah and then after some conversation she said she would come to my house and get it out for me. So, she poked her head inside the bar and told "Jorge" to come out because they were going to my house to get the bat out. So, they all three came to my house. I turned on the lights and gave Jackie a stick to hit it with. Jorge had a towel to use to grab it, and Julie was carrying her drink and watching the show. I grabbed this huge fishing net we have and I told them the thing was upstairs. So, Jackie went first and Jorge followed. Then Julie went up and I took up the end. When I was halfway up the stairs, I heard Jackie say, "There it is! I hit it!" Now, this was a very little stick, maybe 1/2 inch in diameter, but about 4 feet long. Jorge said, "Shut up, no you didn't." So, she said, "Yes I did! Look!" So I finally saw the bat laying there, so I started screaming, threw the net at Julie, and ran like mad down the stairs. Then, a few minutes later Jackie, Julie, and Jorge came down with Jorge holding the very much alive bat wrapped in a towel. I was hyperventilating by that time, and they made sure I was going to live before taking it across town and letting it go. So, now whenever I see those three I start humming the tune to Batman. And Jorge, who is 1/3 of the bat squad, came to get the new bat out. Man, it is times like this I am glad I know 350 of the 400 people in town! And that's that story. After that incident, it took me 6 months to sleep in my room again. Fortunately, I went back to sleeping in there this time only after a few days. Although I have been keeping the lights on. Luckily I have a dimmer switch and keep the lights low, but I want them on a little just in case. I'm a wuss, what can I say? :) Later.

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