Tomorrow is the day.

Yup. The time has come for my clinical interviewer with the psychologist the synod set me up with. I plan on leaving around 6:30 or maybe a little bit later because I'm not sure what traffic and construction work is going to be like up there. I need to look at the Illinois Department of Transportation webpage to see about usual congestion and what not. I hope it's an easy drive. I've never driven that close to Chicago before, although I've been to Chicago many times. Anyway, I'm kind of nervous about what will happen tomorrow because, as I've said before, I think I'm mentally healthy (For the most part) but you never know what a professional will say about you. Anyway, I'm making the trip by myself because Pastor is busy and most of my friends are working. I know that I will be glad when tomorrow is over because I've been rather nervous about this part of the process ever since I took the battery of psychological tests. I know I over-analyzed, and I probably over-generalized about myself, too. So, hopefully this will not offer a hindrance to my application to Candidacy. We'll just have to see. There's really no use worrying about it all. At times like these, I always try to go to the Scripture that says, "So, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today's trouble is enough for today."-Mt. 6:34. Maybe I should print that onto the bag into which I hyperventilate. (that was a joke, I don't usually hyperventilate.) Anyway, I need to go now because I have an early day ahead of me, and some more things to do before I hit the sack. Later.

Woo, it's hot out there!

Wow. I mowed the lawn today and it is HOT!! outside! I had to take a few breaks, although some of them were due to the fact that I'm slightly ill. Anyway, I got the night off work so that I could go to the church to be trained to be on the health team for my congregation as we undertake the process of Natural Church Development. It seems very exciting. I am looking forward to this, so expect to read more about it as time progresses and as we get further into the program! I have to go now! I stink.

Yo Adrienne!

Hi. S'up Skillet!? Ok, enough of that. Do you all want to hear a story? Gather 'round and let me share with you the events of my Friday...

4:00 a.m. went to bed (What can I say? I'm a night owl)
10:00 a.m. woke up (With the help of a cell phone alarm)
10:01 a.m. tried to return the call of the clinical interviewer who tried to call me Thursday. No one answered
10:02 a.m. went back to sleep after setting my real alarm clock for 11:00 a.m. to try calling again
10:55 a.m. answered ringing phone to hear the voice of clinical interviewer. Talked to her for a few minutes when all of a sudden, alarm starts sounding. Thoughts of, "OH CRAP, she's gonna think, 'is that an ALARM CLOCK I hear in the background at 11:00 a.m.? What kind of lazy weirdo am I dealing with!?'" Smack off alarm clock and get appointment set up. Take down directions to get to the place.
11:02 a.m. go downstairs and look up directions to get me to the place where she began her directions
11:03 call my Uncle "Dale" to make sure computer directions are right.
The rest of the day until about 3:00 p.m. was spent pretty much bumming around and semi-freaking out about my impending psychological appointment. Nothing against psychology workers; I've just never been involved with them.
3:45 pm. went to work, was pretty busy, helped train a new waitress, bummed around after work...
10:45 p.m. TOTALLY SMOKED A HUGE RACOON on my way home! I was worried it damaged my car, but I looked and nothing seems to be amiss.
10:46 p.m. made plans to wash car of dead animal entrails in the morning.

So, that was my day in a really boring minute by minute rehash. On a better note, my brother, his wife, and their son are coming up tomorrow. They're staying until Sunday night. I'm thrilled! I don't get to see them nearly as often as I would like to. My little buddy is getting so big, and they say he talks A LOT now. He's 2 1/2. yay, yay, yay! Anyway, happy Memorial Day to you all if I don't post again before then. Drive safely!

It's kind of odd.

I was blog surfing today among blogs I do not regularly read. I haven't done this for quite some time. I have my 5 or 6 blogs that I read pretty regularly and that's usually it. Today, though, I went looking for something new to read. Anyway, I stumbled upon this blog of a woman discerning a call to religious life in a sisterhood. She has an interesting post about "over toasted" baked goods and how that makes her remember her mother. It is interesting to me to read this, at all times, tonight because I've been remembering my father today because he has now been gone for eleven years. This time of year always makes me remember him and as I grow and mature, it's less sad and traumatic. Instead of thinking of how he passed away, it is now easier for me to remember the life he lived. Even more entertaining to me is the fact that my new nephew looks A LOT like him. Ever since the first time I held that child, I thought that he reminded me of someone. Well, last week, I helped Sis bathe him. When he has a wet head, his hair turns curly. That is what did it. I said, "He looks just like Dad! That's who he reminds me of!" And it seems that it is just the little things that make me look back and remember Dad. I had my RealPlayer opened tonight for the first time in months and I listened to "A Walk in the Black Forest" by Horst Jankowski, which was his favorite song. And it's just nice to be able to look back and not feel completely awful about my childhood and that one experience that usually elicits the "pity looks" and awkward comments of people who find out about that part of my journey of life. I can honestly say that my life is good the way it is. I can't always be looking back and thinking that life would be so much better if... Life is the way it is for a reason. I've come a long way spiritually, emotionally, and physically since I was 12 years old. I'm glad to be the person I am and I am thankful for the person I am becoming. And because of this, I think Dad would be proud of me.

I really AM a dork!

Ha. Last night as I was falling asleep, I realized that I wrote "Wednesday" in the previous post! Woops. In my defense, I must say that I was slightly sick and pretty tired last night. I just want this week to hurry up and be done! :) Anyway, I'm just sitting here bummin' around till it's time to go to work. I did a bunch of laundry last night, so I'm caught up with that. I would be outside doing yardwork now, but I don't feel the greatest. It's nothing too awful, but when my nose is running and I have a sore throat, I just don't feel like cutting down huge weeds that have turned into trees in the abandoned neighbor's yard. You know how it goes. Anyway, onto more interesting things. The congregation of which I am a part is going to be doing Natural Church Development. We voted to do this a few council meetings ago. NCD involves a health team which helps spearhead the whole thing. Guess what? I was asked to be a member of the health team. I think my role is going to be less than that of the other members though, because hopefully I will be gone before we finish the program. Anyway, I believe that this health team helps distribute a survey to 30 active members of the congregation. Through these surveys, we find out what our strengths and weaknesses are and work on strengthening our weaknesses. The whole logic behind this is analagous to a barrel. The water in a barrel can only reach the top of the shortest stave in the barrel. So, if we work on getting higher staves, as it were, hopefully we will be able to be more effective in the ministry that is carried out there. Our first training session is Tuesday. I'm looking forward to it, and NOT just because I get that day off work! Ha. Anyway, I need to go now. Have a good day.

A little fun...

Hello all. You may be wondering, what kind of fun is happening on a Wednesday night? Wednesdays suck. But no, Wednesdays do not always suck. Why not? Because of this website where you can download for FREE the original Chiquita banana jingle. It's a lot of fun. I never knew a jingle could be so catchy. My little sister (Who's not so little, by the way; she's 22) was singing the song to my baby nephew and we wanted to know the real words because she didn't know all of them. Well, we stumbled upon the website that has sheet music and the original jingle, which coincidentally is WAY better than the '97 version. At the current moment I am printing out the sheet music so I can entertain! Woot! Ya! I'm a dork, but it's a lot of fun. You should try it sometime. :)

Thinking you have stumbled upon an ordinary blog...

You have instead entered: The Twilight Blog!

I'm just kidding. I've only seen "the twilight zone" about once in my whole life. Anyway, that's not what this post is about anyway. I'm just feeling the need to loosen up.

Last night I had this dream: I was at a church council meeting. It was weird though, because people who are not on the council were there. People whom I have NEVER served with were in there along with Pastor. Well, then Pastor said, "The psychological test results are back. Trish, you didn't make it." I asked, "Why? What did I say that was wrong?" He replied, "One question asked if robbers were good people. You said 'false.'" I said, "Why is that true?" And Pastor answered, "People who go into ministry must realize that some people are better at others at certain things. You didn't catch that, so the psychologist recommended a no for you." Then I looked down at the table and was like, "ok." And Pastor said, "That is another thing. You always look down. Ministers need to have confidence to look the world in the eye, even when things are not going their way." And the people around me, instead of talking about my negative recommendation instead started talking about lawn mowers. That's about the time I woke up. It's a very bizarre dream and I put no stock in it whatsoever, but it's just weird. I also find it funny because one of the questions in one of those personality profiles was something along the lines of, "I believe my dreams are things that should be heeded." I wrote false. My dreams are always just really weird things that generally I can figure out because of things that are going on in my life. So, I think the reason I had this dream was because I've been slightly worried about the results of this test. It's kind of weird though, because that dream helped me realize that they're not going to say no on account of my answer to one question. I imagine they take the whole thing into account. I just hope I came off as a well-adjusted, stable person. Now I'm just waiting to see what they say.

Did you ever notice how difficult waiting is sometimes? We live in an instant gratification society that practically conditions us to want and even expect things RIGHT NOW. As an employee of the food service industry, I see this quite often and am frequently disgusted by peoples' sense of entitlement. However, as I sit here, I realize that I, too, am guilty of wanting things to be resolved RIGHT NOW. I sit here wondering when I will know if I "passed" my psychological evaluations. Now, I consider myself to be pretty stable and level headed. I've made leaps and bounds in my own humble opinion in the past few years. When I was younger, I always felt guilty about things. I've gotten better about that. As a young adult, I had a problem with anxiety. Yes, sometimes I still get nervous (look at this post!) but the fact is that I'm worlds better than I used to be. I honestly believe that there is hope and promise out there, and I want to be one who spreads that hope and that promise. I would really like to do these things in a professional setting. I realize that we are all called to spread the Good News of Jesus in our daily lives, but it is just on my heart, truly and deeply, that I am called to ministry. So, it is in this desire to be a professional that I find myself to be impatient. I want to know RIGHT NOW if the psychologist thinks that I am fit or not. I've said it before, and I'll say it again... I need to have better faith in God's promise that God has a purpose in mind for me. It's just an anxiety-ridden process to wait to see if I've discerned "correctly" thus far. There is always that saying, "Trust that you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now." but sometimes I question that. Anyway, I'm off now, so I'll talk more later.

P.S. sorry that this post seemed to take so many different twists. I was thinking one thing, then I thought another thing, and I felt the need to get both off my chest. :) You are good people for putting up with my twists and turns!

Life is good.

Today was a great day for me. I spent the night at Sis's house last night because it's just nice to get away sometimes. Even though Sis woke me up a few times (inadvertently) in the night to change "Howard" (the diapers and changing table is in "my" room), I still woke up on the right side of the bed. Even when BiL came up and said, "Hey Trish, come down and help me cut up the ham for tonight." I wasn't crabby. I got up, went down, helped chop up 120 pounds of ham, and further did some things. We had cinnamon rolls for breakfast, I got to hold my little buddy. I got to help Sis give him a bath today. Oh my goodness, he has curly hair when it's wet! He's adorable! Well, hanging out at Chez Sis's was not the only thing I did today. One of my best friends graduated college yesterday, and so I went to her graduation party! That was fun. Oh yeah! A "shout out" to all of my newly graduated friends: Jae, Dan, Christina, Sara, and Mark! Yay for you guys! It's something! Well, so after the party, I went to another function: a benefit for a gentleman who has had some bad medical times lately. So, that was good. Everyone was in good spirits, even "Jerry" who is the one who is sick. We didn't stay too late at that though because it was getting too loud for Howard. So, I followed Sis home and then chilled with her tonight. I was holding the baby and he fell asleep on me and that is about the best feeling in the world. :) :) :) Happy. I love that child like crazee!!! But anyway, I have found myself to be kind of a gusher about him, I'm sure that most people out there don't care! Lol. Whatever. Anyway, the events of the day have pushed the "stress" of the past week out of my mind. It's been a wonderful day. I'm very grateful for my friends and family who are so wonderful. And now I have to go put my stuff in the dryer and go to bed! Mother's Day is technically today. Happy Mom's day all you people who have had the blessing and opportunity to lead little ones! Be blessed.

Now I wait...

I took the battery of psychological tests today. Altogether, they took me 5 1/2 hours. I took the MMPI-2, the Strong something or other vocational interests test, a proverbs test, the California Personality Inventory, a fill in the blank test, an adjective checklist, and a "fill in the next logical number/letter" test. After reading the agency's webpage, I'm slightly nervous, but I know that God has God's plan in mind with regards to me and the vocation in which I land. I need to keep in my mind all that God has promised me: Eternal life, love, forgiveness, grace, redemption... I'm just so afraid of being a failure. I don't want to let down the people who have supported me thus far. I don't want to let my pastor down, but most of all, most of the time, I really feel called to ministry and the thought that my perception of this call has been wrong just makes me feel icky. I know it will seem like a long time until I get to see what I have said about myself and if the psychologist thinks I will make a good candidate for ministry. I think my biggest problem will be the fact that I am somewhat indecisive. I think things through A LOT, but once I get them in my mind, I can generally go with the flow. I hope that comes out in the analysis. I don't want them to think I'm a waffler or something. I don't know. I need to go have a chat with you-know-Who now over the events of the day. Please, if you wouldn't mind, say a prayer for me? Thanks.

Dun dun dun duuuunnn!

So, I got word that the synod psychologist sent the MMPI and other testing materials to Pastor. I talked to Pastor this morning and we got my testing set up for Thursday, beginning at 8:00 a.m. I'm kinda psyched, kinda nervous.. But, we'll just have to see all about my psyche! yeah. Anyway, I'm looking forward to actually progressing! This is the most I've gotten to do all at one time so far. I'm just glad I don't have to go to school past Tuesday! Woot! I'll let you know how it goes!

Woah!

Nope, sorry to disappoint you, nothing exciting is going on! So, you might ask, "Why did she title this post, 'woah!'?" I don't know if I got that punctuation right, sorry any English freaks out there... Anyway, I was just thinking about Joey Lawrence, the guy who is pretty much credited with coining that phrase for the t.v. show "Blossom." I don't know WHY I was thinking about him, but I was. Anyway... The semester is almost over. I had two finals yesterday, I sent in a paper today, I have another paper due Monday, a final Monday, and my last final should be Tuesday. That is, of course, if I got a good enough grade on my most recent Psych test. The professor only counts 3 of the possible 4 exam grades, and since it is impossible for me to have gotten an A, I am shooting for a B. If I successfully attained my B with the latest test, I don't have to take the final. Here's hoping. Anyway, I have to go check now. Hopefully, hopefully, hopefully, Dude! Yeah!!!!!!!!!! I DID IT! Wooohoooo! Granted, it's the lowest possible B I could get, but I did it, all the same! That class was hard! I got a B! *Does a happy little dance* I have to go celebrate now! Bye!

Today...

Today was a busy day. You know, being busy can be a good or a bad thing. Today, however, it was, for the most part, a good thing. Today is the day I got to lead worship. Pastor and his wife went on vacation and so he asked if I would lead worship. I was thrilled to say yes. I really enjoy leading worship, and it had been a good long while since I'd had the opportunity. Well, I wrote a message and got all the details all ironed out before Pastor left. He approved my message and all that good stuff, so I was set. So, this morning, I got up, and Ma and I went to church. I led worship, got some really nice feedback, and then headed to the other church that Pastor leads. At that one though, I only have to read the Gospel and deliver the message because one of their congregants does the other parts. It's all good though. They gave me some positive feedback as well. So, church was interesting and more busy for me today. Unfortunately though, then I had to go work at Restaurant. I got sprung into waitress duty because we had a party. Ugh. I really don't like being just shoved into it when it's not planned, but what can ya do? OH well. I was glad to get out of there today though. I came home and took a VERY long nap. :) Hehe. I should have been doing homework, preparing for finals week and what not, but I didn't. I am SO bad! hehe. So, that's what I did today.

Ah yes, I almost forgot to say that things are actually progressing with my application to candidacy! I got some correspondence from the synod psychologist the other day. I had to fill out a "request for monitor" form, and also a "list of references" form. The request for monitor form is a form where I send them information about who will provide the quiet place for me to take the MMPI, and will make sure that I don't get interrupted or anything. Pastor said he would do it, so he got put down on that form. Then, I put some people I work with and serve with down as references, made sure it was okay with them to use them, and then I sent that away. SO, pretty soon, the psychologist will send Pastor the materials for the test and I will get to see all about my psyche. I'm slightly nervous, and yet still more intrigued to see what this test will say about me. I'm just looking forward to seeing some progress made. Anyway, I need to go now. I have another busy day ahead of me tomorrow. Hope you all have a blessed week!

Wow.

This week has been very interesting. I'm just sitting here in amazement, really. Ever since the birth of my little nephew, it seems that I've been much more thankful. He's so wonderful. An innocent, sweet, adorable, new little life is here for us to shape and love and cherish. Tonight I was over at Sis's house and BiL went to his league bowling night. "Howard" (The baby) was sleeping in his bouncy chair on the table because Sis can't bend down right now due to the C-Section she had to deliver him. I could see him at all times from where I was sitting, but I got up every few minutes just to go look at him. Then Sis would come out and look at him. Then, when BiL came home he said, "What are you doing? Just looking at him? Well, stop it, there are people on the front porch who want to look at him too!" (that last part was said in jest, he didn't really expect us to stop looking at him). No one had knocked though, so we were just looking at the little guy. He's just so cute. I love the little guy, and I've only "known" him for 5 days. He's just a wonderful blessing and I'm grateful to God to be given the opportunity to be his aunt.

So, enough emotional blubbering.. Haha. Saturday night I came home from Sis and BiL's house and realized that I'm preaching next Sunday. So, I sat down and wrote a message. I think it's one of the better messages I've ever written, but as soon as I see that Pastor has replied, I will think it is awful. This is before reading his comments though, because he is never anything but constructive and supporting. He's made changes to the message I've prepared before, but always in a positive, non-condemning sort of way. But the fact of the matter is that whenever I see he has replied to something I've written, I get this feeling like he's going to say, "Trish, what's wrong with you? That really could use some work." And this feeling is completely unsubstantiated, because as I've said before, Pastor has never been anything but affirming and encouraging. So, it's just me and my low self-efficacy. But anyway, I'm excited to be leading worship next Sunday, and I hope that God uses me as an instrument of grace and peace. :) And now, with that said, I look down and see that my update is about downloaded. So, I'll be installing this and going to bed. You all have a good day.

P.S. Finals weeks is coming up; pray for me!

Thanks be to God.

I am the proud aunt of a brand new, 7 pound, 14 ounce, 19 inch long, bouncing baby boy! Monday night, I went with Sis and Brother in Law (BiL) to the hospital because she was scheduled to be induced into labor. We thought it was going to be a fairly quick process. When we got there, the nurse took us to the "birthing room" Sis was assigned to. It was nice. There was a couch, a chair, a T.V., DVD/VCR player, furniture, and all kinds of stuff. Sis got settled in and BiL and I sat on the couch. We tried watching a little T.V. but my head was just going a mile a minute. So, the nurse came in and was explaining some things and she asked Sis to change into the robe they provide and all that jazz. So, this is where Nurse tells us that they are giving her one dose of medicine every 4 hours, for 4 doses. That meant 16 hours until they were even planning to give her the more potent stuff! So, after realizing that "howard" would not be born last night, BiL offered to go get some stuff for her to do at Mal-Wart. So, I stayed and BiL went out. It was a lot of fun. Hospitals do not weird me out. I think it's because I had a lot of medical problems that required frequent visits to hospital settings when I was a child. If anything, hospitals bring out my "I'm going to help you" mode. So, the best way I know to help those closest to me is to make them laugh. I had Sis rolling. It was good. So, BiL got back after about an hour, and I stayed for a little while longer. Then, I had to go because I had class today. Looking back, however, I wish I would have skipped class and work because I REALLY wanted to be there for Howard's birth. Lots of people have seen him, and I haven't yet. And now I sound really petty and childish. I really shouldn't because I feel I already have a bond with the little guy. He kicked me in the head when he was still in utero. :) So, Pastor has seen him, younger Sis has seen him, BiL's sister and niece have seen him... But, I'm just grateful that he's healthy (From what I've gathered thus far), and that Sis and BiL finally get to see the little guy that God has knit together in Sis's womb. It's amazing.

So, I got the message that Sis had Howard as I was going in to work today. I was so happy and excited, but at the same time, I was really worked up. My pulse was racing and stuff and I really don't know why. I had to keep moving around for fear I was going to faint. I don't know why at all. I'm not a medical wuss in any sense, really. But, we were swamped tonight at Restaurant so I had to get over it quick. Anyway, I'm going to see Howard tomorrow, at which point I will give him a big, wet, sloppy kiss and say, "this is what you get for kicking Aunt Trishy in the head, buddy!" Hehe. Anyway, I have some stuff to do before I go to bed now. If you said any prayers for the little guy, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thanks be to God!

An amazing amalgamation of emotions!

Wow. Here I sit, waiting for my sister and brother-in-law to get ready. We're going to the hospital tonight for Sister to have her baby! It's going to be an induced ordeal, so that has kinda taken one element of exciting out of the mix. However, at this point, I'm thinking that a slight reduction in excitement is not a bad thing. This whole day I've been kind of a nervous ball of energy. The mama and daddy to be have managed to chill out, watch t.v. and take naps. I, on the other hand, have been occupying my mind with things all day. Also, my knee has been bouncing up and down for a few hours. At the end of this, my right leg will probably look like Popeye's after he eats a can of spinach, and my left leg will probably look like the weakling leg. Ha. Anyway, if you read this before my next post, please pray for safety for Sis and "Howard." These are exciting times. This whole pregnancy, I have been just amazed that God works these little miracles in people. I have found myself praying for the baby like crazy, and it's just increased over the last several days. I know God loves the little guy, because we are fearfully and wonderfully made, but I just am so anxious to see him in person; to see 10 little toes and 10 little fingers, and all of that. I really love babies. So, if you would please, offer up a few words for him. I can't wait till it happens! See you all later, when I am an aunty to nephew number 2!

On a lighter note...

I think something is living in the ceiling above my computer desk. I'm slightly afraid... :$ Yikes!

Some questions that have been running through my mind lately...

So, I'm sitting here, wondering, once again, about my future. Everything is so uncertain that I just find myself rather confused. Ok, so, I'm supposed to graduate in December, but at this point, I'm not really sure because they still haven't resolved the problem of opening up a space for me in the LAST required class I need to take for my major (Sociology). Therefore, that has me wondering. I really do not want to go to School for an additional semester because, frankly, I don't particularly care for School. It's too big, too impersonal, and I'm tired of living at home and commuting. So, I'm ready to be out of there. Another thing I've been wondering about is this whole Candidacy thing. I haven't been able to DO anything in the process for over 2 months now. I'm a little frustrated, because as I've said before, I'm a doer. I like hands-on things. I don't like sitting back for all this time and just letting these things go. Yes, I consider myself fairly laid-back, but at this point I find myself thinking, "Come on, come on, what's the hold up? Can't I do SOMETHING to expedite the process?" Really, now. So, I'm slightly worried about getting my psych eval and Entrance Interview done in time to apply for Seminary. And then, I find myself thinking.... Would it be so bad if I didn't transfer in January? Yes, I want to get this ball rolling, but wouldn't transferring mid-year become problematic down the road? I don't know Greek or Hebrew, so I'd be behind there... Would I have to rush rush rush in order to catch up in order to be able to go out on Internship or CPE or whatever? Also, I heard Candidates have to do 3 J-terms in order to graduate. If I transferred to Seminary in a January, I don't rightly think I'd know what to do for it, so that year would be out, another year I'd be at my Internship, so that only leaves 2 Januarys available. What would I do about that? I guess I should be asking my pastor, the assistant to the bishop, or someone else about this, but these are just questions I've been pondering lately. I'm very frustrated with my lack of faith on this issue. It is frustrating. I should (SHOULD being the operative word here) be content in knowing that God cares for me more than the sparrows of the air, but I am finding it difficult right now. What am I supposed to do? Roll with the punches? Start throwing some of my own? Throw in the towel? Ugh. I don't know. I'll leave you now with my departing words taken from one of my favorite "philosophers:" "And that's all I have to say about that."

I'm not a good cook.

Wow. I am really, REALLY not a good cook. I don't EVER make anything from scratch that involves more than what a grilled cheese involves. I'm bad at making things, heating things, or even just figuring out what is in food dishes. For example, tonight, I came home from Restaurant and decided to have a chicken pattie. You know the kind, where they're fully cooked, you just have to pan fry, bake, or microwave it to done-ness. Well, I made it, and was eating it on a bun and when I got to the middle, I thought, "Chicken patties are NOT supposed to be cold in the middle." Ha. So, I can't even get something that is designed for kitchen dummies like me right! Man, and I have worked in a restaurant for almost 9 years, go figure.

On another note, I am not inept in all areas of my life. I can and do like to use tools when the situation warrants it. I didn't have to "fix" anything today, but I thought, "It's getting SO nice outside that I need to get my bike ready to go out." If you've been reading the ol' blog a while, you will remember me telling you that I no longer drive a big Jeep Cherokee where I just had to open the hatch and throw one whole and complete bike in the back to air up the tires. Now I drive a little Neon which necessitates me folding down the seats and taking the front tire and brake pad off the bike in order to take it to town to air up. So, I did that. It's been on my "To do" list for about a month now. I'm happy though. If I was not such a procrastinator, I could have gone for a bike ride on Wednesday because it was absolutely gorgeous outside. But, I had a 6-7 page paper due Thursday that I didn't start on until Wednesday around noon... So, the bike ride went to the back burner. On a happy note, I did get the paper done. I just hope I get a decent grade. It is my own procrastination that is leading me to the "B" work I've done this semester. I'm bad. Anyway... I'm kind of just procrastinating right now. Why, you may ask? Well, I got home from work and went into the kitchen to find my absolute FAVORITE kind of ice cream sitting on the counter. The bad part? Mom forgot to put it in the freezer. So, I picked it up and found it to be a completely runny mess. I quickly threw it back in the freezer, hoping that ice cream will retake its former shape. I'm having doubts though. Who knows?

And my last bit of information tonight... I have plans for tomorrow! I'm SO EXCITED! One of my very best friends and I are going to see ICE AGE 2 and perhaps get a bite to eat and probably hang out at Mal-Wart or something. I haven't seen him for a few months, so I'm very excited. He's a blast to hang out with whenever we get together. We used to date, but that didn't work out, so we didn't talk to each other for a while. But now, we're just great friends. So, I'm excited. Anyway, hopefully you all have a good Saturday as well! Bye.

Contemplative

Hey, my first April post, would you look at that! Did I tell you all that my sister and her husband are going to have a baby? He's due April 26. So, that means 22 days and counting, although he will probably arrive before then because she has gestational diabetes and they'll probably want to get him out sooner than his due date. He should be fine, he's already 6 pounds something ounces. We're very excited for "Howard" to get here. Howard is not his real name, but it's a 9 month joke we've had going. Perhaps that story will emerge in another post.

The real reason I wanted to blog was to discuss contemplation. Tonight, at our church council meeting, we did things slightly differently. Pastor sent us a letter last week asking us to think of ways we see God at work in the world and in our lives, and how sometimes we perceive God as silent in areas we wish he wasn't silent. Well, I had some examples all ready in my mind, but when it came to talk, I just wanted to listen to others. So, I did. No one called me out, so I was content to hear what others had to say. It was very interesting. However, after the meeting, Pastor came up to me and said, "Awful quiet tonight, Trish." And I told him I was tired, which is not a lie because I am really tired, but it wasn't the whole truth either. The other part of the truth is that sometimes I like to be quiet and just listen to the wisdom and insights of others. In fact, a great deal of the time I want to be quiet and listen. Unfortunately, I usually end up talking in these situations while my brain screams, "Shut up and listen! You can't learn if your lips are flapping." But sometimes, I go through periods where I am very successful at just being a spectator. I don't know why I didn't just tell him that. I'm sure he'd understand. Pastor is a very compassionate, understanding man. I don't know. Anyway, I learned tonight some interesting things about why some people do not hear God's voice when they wish they could. I cannot always hear God's voice ("hear" here is not literal, I never actually "hear" the voice of God) and I wanted to understand the situations that cause confusion and lack of "hearing" for other people. I learned because I kept quiet. I usually find that when I get into one of these "shut up and listen" modes, I learn a lot more. I don't usually get my own points across when I'm intent on just listening, but really, how important is that, anyway? I don't know how long this will last, or if perhaps I'm wrong when I get like this, but I can't really help it. When the mood strikes, eh? Anyway, that's enough for tonight. I just wanted to say goodnight, and if you're reading this blog, go wish Mark at Stumbling Toward Divinity a happy birthday today. It'll be fun, I promise. :) See ya.

A post script (Because I'm a dork)

Ok, I just thought I'd let you all see the extent of my dorkiness by posting a lame joke I came up with. A little background: I started working at Restaurant 8 1/2 years ago as the salad girl. That means I filled up the relishes, lettuce, bread basket, and salads (Cole slaw, macaroni, marinated carrots, etc) when they got low. Anyway, so here is the joke:

One day, the relishes were having an argument with the bread basket. The carrots told the bread, "We're more important than you. We offer all sorts of vitamins and are even good for peoples' eyesight!" The bread said, "Who cares? We're more important because grains are the base of the food pyramid!" Then, the cabbage salad said, "Both of you, shut up! You're both important, and you need to listen to me. You know why? Cuz I'm the slaw 'round these parts!"

Get it? hehe. If you didn't get it, try reading the last sentence with a cowboy twang. If you still don't get it, be proud because you are not as dorky as I am! OK. That's it for now. Bye.